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COMMITMENT


“Do you know what it feels trying to make a relationship work, trying to give men another chance to love after several heart breaks but still, the pain and effort aren't visible. Instead, he cheated on me after all I have gone through which he knows about, I cannot go on. I just want to stay on my own and I am scared if I go into another one, I can't trust him and also be committed nor be submissive to him” Kemisola said. 

“Your is better, I grew up knowing my father as a wife beater. I grew up in a family that everything would be going fine but suddenly, all we would hear is the sound of noise, arguments, nagging which were birthed from Anger. I grew up in a family, where we all dislike our father and pray for him to go somewhere far, far away from sight and we would be happy. I grew up in a family where we could not trust our father, neither any man. I grew up in a family which killed my passion for home as I couldn't boost to marry someone like my father, a man who ought to be our mirror. I grew up in a family which made me dislike men and erased my mind from being committed to any man, neither do I want to get married. I am scared of relationship and I don't think I want to give any chance, I just want to be alone and live peacefully. Sometimes, I tried to but I have been trapped by my past and it makes me desist men. My father keeps putting the blame on my mother. He accused her of many things but she is always quiet and I don't want any man to do that to me, I am scared. I can't keep quiet and I don't want to hurt anybody” Toluwanimi said as she was crying. 

“We were once a happy family, we were just the perfect image of a family. We were united, joyful and living in peace. We were a praying home, people from church, children and others often come to meet us for advice on relationship and marriage.  We lived as an example to people, we had argument but settle it that same day. We love each other and never want to hurt anyone. One day, he left me alone with four children. We didn't quarell, I didn't know what happened. I was submissive and gave my all. I was a committed wife and now after 10years, he came back and he said he was sorry. Sorry, isn't enough. Does he knows how I survived with the children and how our marriage disappointed everyone we gave life and killed the hope of many but it's too late because I don't think we can go back to the way we used to be. I don't know if I can be submissive again. I don't think I can be committed again” Mrs olufunmi said as she wiped her tears. 

Hmm... These are some of the experience woman faced in relationship and marriage that is hindering them for being committed. Most women are not proud or heartless, they are scared of commitment based on what they have experienced or heard and trust me these are issues that needs to be addressed. Having heard all these, some ladies already given up on love. Committed and trust work together when a lady lose her trust in a man,  its very difficult for such lady to be committed to such man but we have to learn to rebuild trust, we can't continue to dwell on our past experience, let it go and pray to God to help you. To help you choose right and rebuild your trust because of lack trust, we push away the right person from us and begin to wallow in pains, broken heart, etc. Even when our heart choose to love again, we hold our selves back. 

Release everyone who has hurt you because if you don't, you are putting them and yourself in bondage. Release yourself from the chains of the past so that you can enjoy what God has in store for you.

I pray for every women scared of trust and commitment, God would touch and help you in Jesus name. He would mend every broken heart and mind. He would fix you to love and trust again. He would lead you rightly in Jesus name...Amen.

God bless you and don't forget to subscribe @www.lightedwords.blogspot.com to get notifications of new write ups. Love you 

Alokan Temilade Victoria.

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