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THORIA'S DIARY

 Welcome to Thoria's Diary


Page 38


 *KIKI'S STORY*


"Life they say is not balanced". 

As much as I want to disagree to the statement,

The situations around me is conforming to it.


I am in a confused state of my life.

And, I don't know what to do,

It seems I want to give up.


My dreams,

My visions,

My goals,


Everything is about to go down because of one decision.

The decision and advice of my parents which is about to terminate everything about me.


Everything I have envisioned,

Everything I love to do,

Everything I want to achieve,

It's all about to crumble.


Somebody help me,

I need help...


I don't even know how to tell people because it doesn't make sense to me.

I have tried to persuade my parents but it seems they have given up and made their final decision.


I know they have tried their best but I am at the point where, I want to achieve more in my academics and all I need from them is their support.

Instead, they feel the best way to achieve that is to send me into marriage. So that my husband will continue from where they stopped.


"But, I am not fit for marriage"  I said as I tried to explain myself severally to them. Yet, they didn't change their decision. I tried involving all my family members but they all seems to put their eggs in one basket.


Now, they are pleading me to accept their offer, so that it can be easier for them. They even went far in choosing a man for me.


A man I don't love and know. I tried my best to make them see from my point of view. Instead, they said "Marriage will grow the love and I will build other things from there"


I am sick and tired of the daily explanation. I am loosing my sanity because nobody is taking my side and now, the matter has gotten worst because I have to choose. Its either their way or mine and if I choose not to go their way, they are ready to disown me and leave me to follow my path.


My heart is heavy, 

Filled with so much pain and fear.

I want my education not marriage,

Yet, I don't want to loose my parents


I need help!!!

My heart is about to explode


To every Kiki,


I know the situation is very challenging and making decision can be difficult. 


Yet, I want you to know it can't be handled by your strength. You need to submit this situation to Jesus.


Yes, I know you want to hear something else apart from Jesus but trust me, nobody can solve the situation better than Him.


If you try using your human knowledge you may crumble and make irrational decision but I want you to give it to God, the creator of both you and your parents...


And when I say give it to God, doesn't mean you won't do anything. You have to keep praying, be attentive to his counsel and be sensitive to his leadings. 


Not only that, giving it to Him will give you a peace that can't be found in the world. Within you, you just have the assurance that it's settled. You carry yourself and walk in that consciousness.


Before you know it, the lord will gradually touch the heart of your parents and they will begin to see from your perspective. There are sometimes, you have to sit them down and discuss with them. Before you know, you will realize there is a change in every discussions.


Though it might look uneasy and unattainable but trust God and approach the situation with confidence that the lord is with you.


But, if you think you can do all of these without involving God. May it not be like waste of time because it will just be getting hot everyday.


Situations like this, might make you feel you don't need God and all you need is a quick solution because God's solution might seems long. Don't be deceived.


Don't give up those vision,

Don't give up on yourself,

Invite Him into that situations and watch how things turn around. He will begin to fill you with wisdom to make things right.


 *Alokan Temilade Victoria*

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