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MY STRUGGLE


*CAN I BE WHOLE?*

My eyes filled with tears,
But not yet fallen.
I'm crying, but they're silent tears.
I'm crying on the inside so you are unable to see
All the pain running though me.

Can I ever be whole again?
I never sleep,
For fear of what tomorrow might bring.
How can I be so lost
In a place I know so well?
How can I be so broken
In a family we've been together for long?
How can I be so confused
Surrounded by so many?

Sometimes I walk past everyone as if I were invisible.
I tell myself that everything's going to be ok,
But it's seizures.
The time it took to change me.
The life I had, I can't have it back.
Yet I can't see why all these tears feel so unreal.
I'm not the same, my words are still unsaid.
So instead, I write them on paper.

So many tears I have shed in the dark,
Hidden away in the privacy of my own thoughts,
Because of no courage to speak of my pain.
And it hurts to know that I'll never be the same,
Knowing I'll never be the girl I used to be.
If you only knew what I've been through,
Or maybe you could take a walk in my shoes,
Because this is sometimes how I feel.
Am I the only one?
I just wish this seizure can seize

Dear Sisters,
I know you might not know the extent at which some people feel pain except you are in their shoes.

The whole experience can be a journey full of more or less pain but whatever it is, always be reminded that you can't do it all by yourself.

I know you might have moments whereby you don't believe in yourself but whatever condition your health is, always hold unto the one true Healer. Jesus Christ, He will guide you through your recovery process and bring Healing to your soul. 
Study and don't depart from His words.

*Alokan Temilade Victoria*
*Light Lamp*
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